merely dating or marrying someone of a different race does not equal self-hate. It’s when someone does so because they believe “other” is somehow better or when they claim they simply aren’t attracted to an entire race of people when they are of that same race. Black people who end up marrying a white person aren’t automatically self-loathing or hypocritical if they talk about racism and its deleterious affects on Black people. They’re only hypocritical if they actively sought out someone who is not Black as their criteria or have a belief that someone Black isn’t good enough (white supremacy). There is a difference between loving someone for who they are and loving someone first and foremost for who they are not. There is a difference between “I married someone of another race because I love them”, “The probability that I will fall in love with someone of another race is relatively high because my dating pool, consisting of the people I have access to in business, my neighborhood, and my shared interests, typically doesn’t include a lot of people from my race (in which case, you have an amazing perspective on how institutionalized racism even influences which children grow up exposed to certain things aka why so many of the Black ones are light skinned or biracial)”, and “I only date/marry people who aren’t Black because Blacks are the lowest on the totem pole”. HUGE DIFFERENCE…and since you didn’t know that, you were actually ignorant to it. That’s all that word means.
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